Now, I could go on for hours about the inadequacies of the system as a whole or the absurdity of the governing body (both in its previous state and the new closed-door dictatorship). While that would also make me feel better, today's discussion will focus on the ridership that uses the system and how much I truly hate some of them.
1. The Perpetual StenchMaybe I have misused the term 'perpetual' as the horrid odours themselves are far from consistent. However, their presence on transit is never in doubt. To try to deal with this Stench (and yes, it deserves to be capitalized) I sometimes imagine a world where I can get on a bus or step onto a skytrain and NOT have the person beside me immediately pass gas. I understand that there may be medical conditions or other reasons why someone can not hold it in, but it starts the second the doors close and never stops for the whole trip. Do people get off on gassing an entire busload of people with the remnants of their extra-spicy burrito? People! For the sake of anything you hold dear, PLEASE STOP FARTING!
2. Gramma's ElbowsRush hour. The train comes hurdling into a station. The brakes engage and the train comes full stop. "Ding-Ding-Ding" and the doors open. Now PUSH!!!!!!
I want to get home just as much as the next person, but to resort to pushing and shoving is a little much. My favourite player in this rugby match is the 4'9" 80 year old hooker (in the rugby sense, you sicko!) who ducks her head and squirms her way through the crowd to make sure that she gets in front of everyone. And of course she gets off at the next stop.
3. The BlockadeOpposite to complaint #2, when the the train/bus gets the the next stop and gramma wants off, there is sure to be a crowd of people - eyes all aglaze - blocking the doorway. No number of "excuse me"'s, "pardon me"'s or "get the hell out of my way"'s can help you out here. You need Moses like powers to part this sea. Be cautious! By the time you have found your way through the labyrinth the doors will smash on you and try to dislocate you shoulders!
And again, I feel so much better. Thank you for indulging a cranky little boy.